I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
