we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize
