I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
