I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
