I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Randomize