party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I forget how to act sober
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
