in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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