I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize