I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
