I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
