Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
