i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
