Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
