He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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