I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
well you can't waste a boner
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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