hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
