ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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