i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
We need a shit load of segways right now
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
