If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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