oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
