my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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