I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
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I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
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He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.