Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
