Your tits are I can't wait for
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
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