You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize