i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
