The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
