We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
