last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
