..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
