And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
