We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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