I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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