In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
