My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
