Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
