I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Who died my cat blue again?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
