how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
