I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
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