I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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