Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize