I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
