physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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