hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize