Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
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