When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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