like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
