I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
