There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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