no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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